Rants

So, right now, I might be dying.
Nathan says it’s not technically me dying unless I actually am dying, but my throat hurts so badly at the moment that I think I might just die.  I can’t get to a doctor though because it’s snowing, the school clinic is closed, and I’m on the other side of the country from my doctor.  So in essence, I am going to die.

There have been a few things that I have wanted to write about, but haven’t really had the energy to write about until now. 

The first thing is that I can’t stand people who don’t do anything to help themselves.  For example, there is a girl in my building who is bigger than I am, and when told that the elevators were out of order, she got another girl to go down and get her laundry for her.  Look, I’m not dissing her because she’s a big girl (I’m pretty big myself) but honestly, if I did laundry, I’d walk down the flights of steps to go and get my own damn laundry, instead of making someone else do it for me.  By not doing it yourself, you’re not helping yourself any, and I have no pity for you.  If someone would ever ask me to do something for them simply because they were lazy, I’d tell them no right off the bat.  Go do things yourself.  You’re in college now, get some damn independence! Learn to do shit yourself, even in difficult situations.  What are you going to do in life if you can’t figure out how to do things yourself now?

Another rant I have is about how friendships can end up changing.  A few blogs ago…I don’t know how many exactly…I had mentioned my best friend in it and how our friendship ended.  Or something to that effect.
Over break, she forgave me and we became friends again.  But our friendship isn’t the same now.  She used to be the girl I could tell anything and everything to, and now I have to constantly bite my tongue and hold myself back from saying what I really want to say, just so I can keep our friendship together.  And I hate it.  Usually the things involve her boyfriend, because I still hate him and think she could do a million percent better than him, but I bite my tongue and keep my mouth shut.  It sucks, but I’m proud of myself for having kept my cool as long as I have.  I go and vent to Nathan about my true feelings after I’m done talking to my friend.  And that’s what makes Nathan my true best friend; I tell him anything and everything and he deals with it.  I really love him for it.

While I’m talking about friendships changing, there’s another friendship that has changed, and I’m sad it has.  I’ve had the same girl best friend since I was in 8th grade.  Everything was fine with us, and we talked all the time.  Then she moved to Arizona, got a job, got a boyfriend, and now I’m out of the picture.  She says we’re still friends and she’s just super busy all the time, but the thing is, I’m busy too, and I still find time to talk to people online.  I feel as though she just doesn’t care about me anymore, and I don’t mean enough to her to actually have her talk to me and stuff anymore.  I was going to try and find a way to go visit her in Arizona over spring break, but I think I would be wasting my time and money.  I would be going to simply try and rekindle our friendship, but if I feel as though she isn’t making an effort now, then why should I attempt to make an effort?  I’ve been trying to make an effort for over a year now, and sometimes you have to know when to give up.  And I hate it, because I still consider her my best friend…but it isn’t the same anymore.

Y’know, I’m an amazing friend.  I know it sounds really narcissistic and like I’m full of myself, but it’s true.  I am an amazing friend.  That’s why on facebook and myspace my url was goodfriendtiltheend.  But I can only be a good friend if the people I’m friends with show me the same courtesy.  And I’ve found that most of the time, that doesn’t happen.  I try my hardest to be the best person I can.  I always make myself available to talk to via phone/texting, and I’m always there for the person.  It just makes me sad that I am a good person, and sometimes it really isn’t reciprocated.  Okay, enough about friends.

Okay.  So I don’t understand why guys are so fucking disgusting.  Nathan lives on the 9th floor of our dorm room, I live technically on the 7th, but usually I don’t want to take the stairs/elevator down 2 flights just to use the bathroom…and sometimes I have to pee so badly that I can’t make it down that far to use the bathroom.  I resort to using the bathroom on the guy’s floor (After Nathan goes and makes sure no one is in there).  I regret it pretty much every time I go in there.  It is positively disgusting.  Do guys NOT know how to flush a freakin’ toilet?  Is it really that difficult to push down a little handle?  I don’t think so.  I also don’t think it’s such a hassle to wash your hands.  Not only does it get pee residue (or OTHER residues) off your hands, but it also helps to keep you from getting sick.  A number of times I have also gone in there to find that most (if not all) of the toilets are clogged.  Do you need to use a whole roll of toilet paper to get your ass clean?  I don’t even use much and my ass is bigger than *most* of the people on this floor.  It’s ridiculous.  I’ve found that it occurs in the girl’s bathroom as well, but it is a much more common occurrence in the guy’s bathroom than the girls.

Speaking of guys, let me rant about Nathan’s neighbor for a little.  He is an annoying fucking ass, and so is his stupid, loud, obnoxious, stoner friends.  They’re always loud.  Like, seriously.  There is a rule in the dorm that quiet hours are at 10 pm until 7 am.  His neighbor plays guitar/talks to his friends until 1 am.  On a regular basis.  I didn’t use to be such a giant grouch, but apparently when I can’t sleep, I get extremely angry and want to kill anyone/everyone in the vicinity.  Usually I end up wanting to kill Nathan, but that’s because he snores super loud in his sleep sometimes.  And who could blame me for wanting to smother him over that?  But at the moment I am sick, and just want to get some rest, and his neighbors are fucking loud and obnoxious so late at night, and I can’t sleep.  So I end up thinking up ways to kill them.  I mean, that’s normal, right?  One of these days I think I might snap…and it will be frightening.

I know that this blog is just a bunch of giant-ass paragraphs and that’ll get boring to read, so if you’re with me thus far, then maybe you’ll be willing to go a little farther (Yes, I kind of took that from Shawshank)

And by that, I mean, maybe you’ll let me humor you by posting extremely random pictures I find on the internet on here.  Deal?  Okay, deal.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ehhh I got bored. And surprisingly, I get bored extremely easily. So that’s why you only have 5 wonderful pictures to look at. If you want more though, let me know and I’ll come up with a completely random blog with a bunch of pictures that make no sense and have nothing to do with each other.

Experiences with Nathan

Okay, just to clarify, when I say the word ‘experiences’, I’m not about to exploit sexual escapades or anything like that haha.  This blog might not be rated G, but it’s definitely not going to be rated X either.  Plus, I think it would be extremely awkward and weird if I did make a blog about that. Ever.  So don’t expect one.
Anyways, when I say ‘experiences’, I mean developments in our relationship.

For example, the day we moved from being a solely online relationship to something more than that;
Aka: the day I actually met Nathan.

Now, that was the Saturday before I started college is when I officially moved into my room.
Technically, my stuff was moved into the room on Friday, but I stayed at the hotel room on Friday night (partially because the beds are amazing, and partially because I wanted to spend one more night hanging out with my daddy before he came back to Pennsylvania).
So Saturday morning, dad drove me to the college and made sure I had everything, and then he hugged me and said he had to go now, and I knew he said it because he was going to cry.  And it’s a good thing he left too; if I would ever see my father cry, I definitely would end up crying.  I mean, I ended up crying anyways, but that’s not the point.

So he left, and I was alone in my room. 

On Saturdays, Nathan works, and this was pretty early in the morning, and he hadn’t left for work yet.  Naturally, I wanted to meet him, so before he went to work, he said he could come down to my floor and meet me (we live in the same dorm building).

He told me he was headed down and my heart was beating so fast. I seriously thought I was heading towards a heart attack. I was meeting my boyfriend of almost 9 months (at the time) in person.
I saw him at the door and my heart skipped a beat.  I was so nervous, and even though I previously felt so confident talking to him and stuff, at that moment, all my shyness came back and I could barely stand to look at him.

So he came into my room and stood by my bed while I sad down at the desk to talk to him.  I still couldn’t look at him, and every time I glanced up at him, I felt all flushed and had to look away. He was trying to talk to me and make me feel better about meeting him and stuff, and after a few minutes he had to leave for work.
So I got up and hugged him, and then he left.

Even though I had been so shy and embarrassed, it was still one of the best moments of my life.


And then…
Later that day, after he got done with work, I went to hang out with him again…
…in his room this time
(my roommate was in our room at the time and I wanted to see his room anyways)

I still felt really embarrassed about being around him, but I tried to talk about stuff to make things a little more comfortable.  I first started ranting about the view from his room being better than mine. (And it totally was)

I sat in front of his window looking out it while he laid in his bed, looking at me.  Eventually he got up and I decided to go lay in his bed instead….
…which was fine, until he decided to lay in his bed as well.

Then my heart started to beat faster again and I got super nervous.
He just wanted to cuddle, but I still was getting all freaked out.
Eventually, I got less nervous and was able to feel very happy about being in the same room as him—and even in the same bed!

He kept wanting to kiss me, but I had told him no a million times over.  He also knew that I wanted our first kiss to be perfect.  Like something out of a movie…I’m really into overly cliché stuff.
Buuuuut after awhile I could help it and asked him to kiss me.
And he asked if I was sure…
I said yes, and when he kissed me…it just was…magical.

Nathan is the second person I have ever kissed in my life, and I’m almost positive at this point he will be the only guy to kiss me for the rest of my life.

So that was pretty spectacular.  I don’t know if it was too overly mushy for you guys or not, but I thought it was…sweet.
As I write this blog I can’t help but smile.  That’s just the way I feel when I write about Nathan.
(And when he reads this blog, I know he’s going to end up smiling too.)

Two other instances that I’ll talk about will be our first date, and our 1-year anniversary.
(I’m not going to make the blog any longer than that, because I know a lot of you won’t really care about Nathan, and will just get bored with the gooey-mushy-lovey-doveyness, and hate my blogs, and never read another one again after this one.
So, I’ll only talk about a few things total.)

There really isn’t a whole lot that I can ramble on about when it comes to our first date.  It happened towards the end of September, and we ended up going to the Hill Aerospace Museum, which is at Hill Air Force Base in Roy, Utah.  Which we were able to get to by bus, so it wasn’t so bad.
…although we did have to walk a good distance to get to the base from the bus stop, but it was still worth it.

If you haven’t had the tremendous pleasure of visiting an aerospace museum at an air force base, I recommend that you put that on your bucket list.  Especially if you like airplanes.
Why?
Because that’s what the museum is: a shitload of airplanes that are out on display! What could be cooler than that?
It’s also free, and you don’t even need to get onto the military bases to access the museums.
By the way, the one in Utah isn’t the only one out there…but it definitely was the closest to Weber.

Anyways, we went there, and we ate lunch first.  Which didn’t take long.  And then we started to wander around the planes outside, looking at them and talking…and I kept taking a million pictures.  And that’s pretty much all I ever do.

And then we realized that we could actually go inside the place!
There were even more planes inside…and! There were a lot of different outfits that like pilots and such would wear over the decades.  The wax dolls wearing them were a little creepy, but totally cool!
There were so many awesome planes…but my favorite was this giant black one with red lettering.  I forget what it was called, but trust me, that plane was badass!

It was a pretty amazing day I must say.

 

Our 1-year anniversary occurred on the 29th of November, 2011.  I had my friend Emily curl my hair for me to make sure I looked adorable.  And trust me, I did.  Nathan thought I looked pretty amazing too, which really boosted my self esteem for that night.  Anyways, we ended up going to Olive Garden, and my friend Chelsie drove us.

It was a very nice dinner, and our waitress was amazingly nice.

Then we went to the mall, and I agreed to go see The Muppets with Nathan.  I actually hate the Muppets, but I love Nathan, so I dealt with the movie for his sake.  Even though that is so, I still thought the movie was decent.  Extremely overly cheesy at parts, but still a decent movie.  And I would even watch it again.

So that was a really short summary of what had happened, but that’s pretty much it.  Nothing really over-the-top happened, but it still was amazing.  I can’t believe I’ve been with him for as long as I have now.  But I feel lucky and happy to have him in my life.

 

Nathan and I had another experience together recently; we stayed at a hotel together overnight, but I’ll save that story for another time. (=

Well, I hope you didn’t mind this blog too much; Nathan means a lot to me, and I just thought I would share some of the things we’ve done together with you guys.